My 30th Birthday Vacation!!!

But wait!  Didn't you turn 30 in November?
Yes, yes I did.  But life was super busy and I slacked at blogging there towards the end of 2014 so I'm just now getting around to blogging about it.

On November 21st, I turned 30 years old.  Looking back, when I was much younger, I thought 30 was so old.  Thankfully, as I turned 30, I didn't feel old.  While I'm not happy that the years seem to go by much faster now, I don't want to be that person that dwells on how old they are.  Because really, 30 isn't that old.  I plan to live to at least 80, so technically, I haven't even made it halfway through life.

I also find it hard to be really upset for turning another year older after all I've been through.  There was a year of my life where I wondered if I'd see my next birthday.  Or how many more I would have.  Cancer does that to you, especially when doctors don't even think you'll beat it.  Cancer makes you appreciate every birthday you have.  You recognize that it's a privilege denied to many.  Throughout the past 9 years of my cancer journey, I've become friends (albeit mostly internet friends) with many cancer survivors.  Sadly, a few of those were not as fortunate as me and they're now celebrating their birthday each year in heaven.  It's hard to stomach, and sometimes I have survivor's guilt, but it helps me to be thankful for birthday.

Which is also why I feel birthdays are a big freaking deal!!!  They should be celebrated!!!!  I'm not saying they need to be some giant Pinterest worthy shindig.  It doesn't need to consist of a table full of gifts, grand gestures, or a room packed full of people.  But I do firmly believe something, big or small, should be done to make the birthday special; to set it apart from every other day of the year.

I will admit, as the days grew closer to my birthday, I was getting bummed out.  I had always pictured my 30th birthday to be a giant celebration.  And by giant, I mean a party surrounded by my large, loud, loving family and all my closest friends.  Nothing more than that.  Just sitting around, drinking some adult drinkies, playing some games, laughing and having a great time.  But I knew that wouldn't happen.  First of all, I wouldn't be anywhere near my family.  When I had this dream of a big 30 celebration, I didn't know my life would lead me to where it is.  I'm living in Florida with my family and best friends in St. Louis.  Second of all, I wouldn't be getting silly over wine because I'm with child (although not one bit sorry about it!)

There really wasn't any way for Nick to make my birthday wish come true, so he was already starting out at a disadvantage.  But leave it to Nick to think of the perfect birthday surprise.  A CRUISE!!!!!!!!!!!
We are heading to the Bahamas next week, folks!!!!!!!!  When he told me, I was ecstatic.  I've never been on a cruise but have always wanted to go.  Taking this trip is the absolute perfect 30th birthday experience.
Unfortunately, the cruise had to wait for a while.  It was a tease to know back in November that my birthday gift was a cruise, but to wait for it.  January was the only time that we were able to find a cruise that worked with both of our schedules.  We're lucky enough to live just 15 minutes from the Jax port so booking via the last minute cruise websites was simple.  It was a little more difficult to find a long weekend cruise that worked for both of us but we did it!  And I cannot wait!!!!  Take me away from this dreary, chilly weather!  Put me in a bikini (yes, I'm pregnant and will be wearing a bikini.  Bite me.)

I'm finalizing my paperwork with my doctor and cruise line.
I've already made my packing list.
I'm reading all about the cruise ship, the various restaurants, entertainment, and ports.
I've received (and exchanged and received again) all new swimming suits since none of my old ones cover even half my boobs anymore.

I.am.ready!!!!
Bring on 5 whole days without contact with the outside world!
Bring on 5 whole days of warmth and sunshine!
Bring on 5 whole days of quality time with my husband!
Bring on 5 whole days of amazing food, whenever I want!
BRING.IT.ON.

The next week of work is going to be difficult, but I've got a countdown and I'm ready to go!!!  Here's to hoping I can be productive until then!

Recap: Trip Home to St. Louis

It's really hard for me to write this blog post because I feel guilty focusing on my time at home that was fun.  When I think about my trip home, Grandpa's passing is the first thing that enters my mind.  And it's hard to push that aside and remember all the fun I had while home.

My original intent for going home was not for Grandpa.  I go home every August to get my yearly surgery AND because my Dad would be turning 60!!!!  Grandpa going through chemotherapy treatments was just a perk for me to get to spend that time with him.  I know a lot of people think I was heading home because of Grandpa, but in reality, I had my August trip planned since well before we even knew Grandpa had cancer.

Leah and I headed home to St. Louis, with her dogs in tow, on August 2nd.  Here are some of the significant highlights from my trip home:

Cousins' Night Out:  Backstreet's Back!
On August 3rd, after spending the day at Grandpa and Grandma's house, we headed out for our Cousins' Night Out.  We decided to relive our childhood at the Backstreet Boys concert (Let it be known that we were all obsessed with *NSYNC.  Our loyalty still lies with them but who could pass up a boy band concert to relive the past?!)  We went out to dinner and then headed to the concert.  After the concert, we had a slumber party at my cousin Teeny's condo.  In the morning, we crashed her parents house for my uncle's infamous chocolate chip and M&M pancakes!!!

(we are not duck-facers.  This was done with the intention of mocking that ridiculousness.)

Endoscopy
This was the reason for my visit home and thankfully, all went well.  (I blogged about this while I was home so you can check it out HERE)

Chemo with Grandpa
In 2006, I underwent a very intense cancer treatment regiment.  I first started with radiation, which lasted six weeks and I went every weekday.  Following those six weeks, I had another six weeks to try to gain some weight (radiation knocked me down pretty badly and I was weighing in at just 101 pounds).  I finally began chemotherapy and my regiment was the most intense at the time, with two of the strongest drugs.  I went to chemo Monday through Friday every third week over a 15 week period (five total weeks).  My chemo sessions kept me at the hospital for almost 8 hours each day.  Because chemo was so long and so frequent, my mother could not attend all my treatments with me.  As I'm sure you know all know by now, I have an amazing family.  Aunts, uncles, siblings, friends, cousins, etc took off work and skipped classes to take me to chemo, sit with me, and bring me home.  During this time, I was pretty sick.  I slept the entire day...the ride to the hospital, in the waiting room, during my chemo infusion, the ride home, after I got home, and all night long.  I really was not awake during my chemo weeks.  In addition to this, I got so weak that I was wheelchair bound unless in my own home.  Grandpa, being retired and so awesome, was one of my regulars at chemo.  He sat with me, in those freezing cold rooms, all day long.  So caring and loving.  Always providing a smile and a laugh.  It was very important for me to get to attend at least one chemo treatment with him.  I could never repay him for all the love, support, and laughs he gave me during my cancer journey, but I wanted to do this with him.  I wanted to now be his chemo buddy.  Thankfully for me, one of his chemo treatments fell during my visit home.  This was his second chemo treatment, and it ended up being his last.  I drove Grandpa, Grandma, and Leah to chemo on August 8th.  We sat with Grandpa, having quite a few laughs, and I helped Grandma with feeding tube "lunch".  The next day, I took Grandpa back to get his white blood cell shot.
I am so thankful that I was able to spend this day with him.  Grandpa's love and support during my cancer battle meant the world to me and I'm happy I was able to repay him, even though it was nothing compared to all he's done for me.  I'm happy we were able to fill his days with smiles and laughs during such an awful experience.  I will forever be grateful that I was able to attend a chemo with him, as he did with me.

Sibling Weekend
The weekend of the 9th through the 11th, Leah and I headed to Kansas City (well really Kansas but who wants to admit they went to Kansas??  Not I!).  Randy moved to KC a few months ago for work and Ben just recently moved there after getting a new job.  It's weird to have him living 4 hours from home but I'm happy he's happy and finally back with Randy.  We had a great weekend seeing his new place, hanging out with friends (they started out as his friends but after my many years of living in CoMO, they've turned into my friends as well), and enjoying time with just us siblings.  We talked about our childhood, our concern for Grandpa, Grandma, and our own parents.  We talked about our fears and wishes.  It was a much needed mini-vacay for me and I wish my siblings and I could have this more often.

Of course we went out for some Kansas City BBQ

Ben & Mark found a video game-esque beer so of course they bought it.  And of course Ben drank it out of his Mario Brother's mug.

Ben bought an original Clue game at a swap meet but he'd NEVER played before!!!  Of course we broke it out to play a few games (while also watching the movie "Clue")

Dinner with Friends
I was able to squeeze in some really quick dinners with friends.  I hate that time home is so rushed but I love getting to see my friends.  I consider myself very lucky to have kept in such close contact with so many of them and I feel we're closer than we were when I was living in St. Louis.

Cardinals Game
Nick came in town halfway through my (what should have been) last week in town.  His aunt and uncle invited us to a Cardinals day game and of course we accepted.  We met them at a casino downtown where the guys gambled and Nick's aunt and I chatted.  We attended one freaking awesome game where the Cardinals made a ridiculous come back to beat the Pirates in extra innings.

Fireworks for the WIN!

Afterwards, we happened to walk by Jim Hayes and Rick Horton doing their post-game show.  We took some photos of them doing their broadcast and then Nick's aunt suggested that Nick and I pose with them behind us, at their desk, doing their show.  As she takes the picture, we see her laughing.  Upon getting my phone back, I look at the photo and see this:

They photobombed us!!!  We wanted them just sitting there, doing their broadcast but instead we got this.  Epic!! When I looked up, the two of them were laughing so hard and they asked to see the photo, upon which they laughed even harder.  They are Nick and my favorite sports talk show hosts because they always seem like such goofy guys, always laughing.  And this photo just confirms that!

Dad's 60th
This was one of my main reasons for coming to St. Louis.  Dad turned 60 on the 16th!!!!  My Dad is who I get the "big kid at heart" thing from so for his birthday, he simply wanted to spend the day at the Zoo with his family.  And that's what we did.

We had dinner plans but we got a call that Grandpa was being taken to the emergency room so we all headed there instead.  Sadly, this is where we spent the remainder of Dad's birthday, and Leah's birthday the next day.  Sunday was supposed to be a large birthday party for Dad and Leah, but we decided immediately to cancel that because of things going on with Grandpa.  (Which ended up being a good idea, because Sunday was the day Grandpa passed away.)

My amazing family, together, as we were for three days, in the waiting room.

Unfortunately, the rest of my visit home would be one of tears and heartbreak.  Grandpa never left the hospital.  All 16 of us stayed the next three days at St. Anthony's until Grandpa finally left us to be with Jesus.  His passing was very unexpected.  Many have asked what happened and I do plan to write a blog post about it.  I apologize in advance because it might be all over the place.  Friday afternoon through Sunday all seem to run together but I'll try to remember what I can.

Nick's Family Visit

Nick and I were fortunate enough to have his Uncle Scott and Aunt Debbie come visit us for a week!  This was their first trip here and we could not have been more excited!!!!!

For those that don't know, Nick's uncle and aunt are like second parents to him.  His parents are not a part of his life anymore but these two make up for that vacancy tenfold.  We could not ask for any better relatives than these two.  They support us and love us just any parent would.  They go above and beyond what any parent should, let alone an uncle and aunt.  I am so incredibly blessed to have married into a family like his.  So many people complain about their in-laws but I can say with 100% honestly that I LOVE my in-laws!

Their visit seemed to fly by but we made the most of it.  Nick only had the weekends off work but we spent those days touring his base, visiting the National Museum of Naval Aviation, going up in the Pensacola LightHouse (it was our first time up!  And boy is that a workout!  Nothing compared to my leg day workouts!!!!).

Stairs that go up the top of the light house

How would someone survive that fall?!  

The Pensacola LightHouse is said to be one of the most haunted lighthouses in the US.  In the basement, we watched the entire Ghost Hunters episode about the light house.  So neat!  I want to do the Ghost Tour at night here!

Nick and his Uncle Scott in front of the T-6B Texan II, the plane he flew in Primary Training

Explaining about his helo's engine

Professor Nick explaining how the helo works

Nick explaining the areas of his base

Nick and Scott in his helo as he explains it all to him

During the week, Nick's family and I headed to the beaches.  It was really great to spend so much time with them, alone.  We only see them when we go home and it's always so busy.  We're usually around at least five other people so it's not real quality time.  It was so great to spend so many hours, relaxing by the beach, and just talking...hearing stories about Nick's childhood and his family.  I truly cherished these days with them.

Bushwacker of course!

Bud Platinum

Nick had an early flight and was able to join us for the last half of the day.  So of course we stopped for sno cones!

We spent our evenings going out to dinner, sitting at home having adult beverages, and going through old family photos!

Lunch view

Lunch

Nick's family's homemade amaretto, over ice.  Delicious!

Of course we had dinner at McGuire's.  And what's a McGuire's outing without an Irish Wake?

Lunch on the beach

This also happened to be Nick and my first visit here as well!

Wine and delicious spinach artichoke dip!

I had never seen pictures of Nick pre-high school but he dug out a huge box of photos he took from his mother's abandoned storage unit and we went through them.  Um, can you say adorable?!  He hasn't changed much at all!!!!!!!

It sucked saying goodbye to them after such a great visit but we're happy we'll be seeing them in August when we venture home and again in late August when they head back for Nick's winging!  I truly am blessed to have this family in my life!